Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Housewife's Lament

"Oh Life is a toil
And Love is a struggle
Beauty will Fade
and Riches will Flee
Pleasures they Dwindle
And Prices they Double
And Nothing is How
I would Wish it to Be"

I sang this English Ballad all hepped up in a hot pink feather boa with a big band behind me--the audience laughing and singing along. It's called the Housewife's Lament and it's all about-- dirt.

Spent 3 hours (3 really solid hours!) cleaning last night while Sruli took the babies (and Zachary) to the Target Mall. You should see our Klez Off
ice-- it's glittery. You should see my living room floor-- it's glossy. Bags of stuff outta here. I feel 25 pounds lighter...
Speaking of which.

I'm really thinking before I eat, lately. Maybe because of this blog, but also because I'm beginning to notice how much better I feel.
Also that I was able to fit back into my Isaac Mizrahi skirt (from Target) after only a week.
I've been getting such nice encouragement from friends all over-- Thank You.

Today I went to Dunkin Donuts with Zachary for breakfast and I DID NOT
order anything other
than an iced coffee. Ok, I did take a few bites of the twins' wheat bagel,
but that does not count at all.
I had some yummy tuna salad and for a late dinner some rotisserie chicken and one entire bottle of fancy beer from Canada.

When I was at Diet Center, way waaaaaaay back when I was 26, alchohol was strictly forbidden.
I did 8 weeks of dieting where every single thing I was allowed to eat fit on the back of a business card. Carrots weren't on the list-- too much sugar. Broccoli too-- can you imagine? Too much sugar, in broccoli? Hard core. I lost 36 pounds and I am embarrassed to admit that I even had my bosses chasing me down the halls.
(Back then I guess there was no such thing as sexual harrassment)

Anyway, alchohol was forbidden. I didn't really like alchohol much back then, so it wasn't such a big deprivation. Now-- bring it on-- especially bourbon and red wine.

Aaron, my 15 year old, who is a Men's Health Magazine maven knows the caloric content of everything. I'm going to ask him to make me a list of all my foods. He already told me about peanut butter (100 cal per tablespoon) and olive oil (140 cal per tablespoon) and I was too depressed then to ask him anything else.

Ok-- enough lollygagging: Today, I also ate some leftover eggplant stew, one slice of pizza,
and 2 squares of dark dark chocolate with sea salt.

I've been drinking lots of tea-- made the Christopher Hitchens' way, according to his memoir.
Russian Caravan-- a tremendous tea.

Haven't been to the gym in 3 days-- but cleaning last night made me sweat
as much as watching Saeb Erekat on CNN during treadmill.
Hope to go tomorrow tho' it's Sisyphean, the gym.

Which brings me back to the Housewife's Lament:

"There are worms on the cherries and slugs on the roses
And ants in the sugar and mice in the pies
The rubbish of spiders no mortal supposes

And ravaging roaches and damaging flies...
With grease and with grime from corner to center
Forever at war and forever alert...
She lay down her broom, her apron she folded
She lay down and died and was buried in dirt."

1 comment:

  1. I remember that song from when I was a kid! I don't know why, but I was thinking about it recently. Maybe it's because I heard you humming it or something. The words may be upsetting, but the tune is very pretty.