Oy.

Well, baby twins are already a year and a half, I'm about to embark on a new "bidness" and I'm starting to make crooked eyes at all those hot-moms-my-age who show up as guests at the Bar Mitzvahs I play and who leave lots of white space on their plates from the buffet.
Oy-- it's time.
My diet nazi from 7 years ago (yes, that's the last time I was giddy with how I looked) was adamant about keeping a food diary-- she was adamant about everything-- and I decided that the best way to ensure compliance with my new caloric reality was to confess all to people I don't even know-- and even more scarily to people I do.
Oy-- it's time.
I am Jewish and I LOVE to eat. I love everything about eating-- the smells, the textures, the preparation, the serving, the parties, the crockery from Jerusalem's Armenian Quarter. I love breakfast, I love lunch and I love dinner. I love cereal I love salad I love pizza I love pasta and I love good multi-grain bread toasted with peanut butter. Plain tart yogurt, frozen, with a zillion toppings. I love Cabernet wine and Kentucky Bourbon and peach schnappes. I love rotisserie chicken. Really good Chopped Liver. Love lamb chops. Hamburgers with sauteed shrooms. Falafel. Grilled Salmon. I love almost every side dish or soup ever invented. I love chocolate desserts and fruit desserts and sesame desserts.
I don't love every single food-- cheese, except on pizza, grosses me out, like I used to say.
But there seems to be a bounty and since I'm the mom and Queen of the Kitchen, since I'm an adult, actually, I can pretty much buy, prepare, and eat whatever I want.
Ok, enough lollygagging-- here's what I ate today:
(Oy, like I can remember...? no, you idiot, this is the whole point!!!)
16 Wheat Thins with at least 3 tablespoons of peanut butter (this really has to stop)
A rotisserie chicken breast and a half with a ton of sauteed spinach and one medium sized baked potato
A lot of watermelon.
Iced coffee with sugar even tho I told the babe at Dunkin Donuts not to put sugar in it
6 inches by 2 inches (that's how it's sold!) of that yummy sesame crunch snack with honey
to eat with the sugary iced coffee
One half chicken breast (a chicken day-- my big boys were home (yay!!) and that's what they wanted) plus 2 helpings of Trader Joe's quinoa and a small amount of corn/lima bean mix plus a few baby carrots dipped in Hummus, oh, and half a wheat roll. Hey, at least it was wheat.
Concord grapes and a few raspberries.
Wow-- I think that's all, but it's a lot. Upon review, we are a bit carb-heavy, aren't we, Lisa?
I DID however, go to the gym and had a pretty good workout with 4o minutes of cardio and about 2o minutes of weights plus situps, etc.
Ok-- I also see that I am NO WAY going to lose any of this disgustingness if I don't have some NORMAL way of measuring and if I don't cut seriously back on these carbs.
Hmmmm. Portion control, what a concept.
Hope the thought of sharing this with all of you begins my happy embarrassment and perchance
my helpful shame: now that I know I'm writin' it all down...
Oy-- it's really time.
Thank you.